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How I used the 'Big Book' to recover: some personal experiences and views of one individual. This is not an official twelve-step fellowship website. I do not speak for any twelve-step fellowship. The material is shared for fun and for free. If it helps, great! If it doesn't, don't worry about it! My programme is a perpetual beta, so it changes with my experience. If you're on the mobile app, click the hamburger (≡) in the top right for pages and links.

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Showing posts with the label Self-pity

Posts

(Self-)love and marriage (horse and carriage)

on August 27, 2025

Dishonesty Self-pity Step Eleven

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Unburdening

on March 21, 2025

Al-Anon Self-pity Sharing Solutions

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Self-pity, pity, and self-righteousness

on August 18, 2024

Pity Self-pity Self-righteousness Victimhood

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Self-pity

on July 09, 2023

Reality Self (ego) Self-pity Wanting

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Relishing suffering

on June 28, 2022

Self-absorption Self-pity

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Boring

on March 21, 2022

Relationships Self-abandonment Self-absorption Self-pity

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Taking responsibility

on November 18, 2019

Responsibility Self-pity

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Labels

AA history2 Abandonment1 Abstinence5 Acceptance38 Acting out10 Action65 Addiction8 Adversity1 Advice11 Agitated1

Agnosticism6 Agreement2 Al-Anon362 Al-Anon slips1 Alcohol2 Alcoholism21 Altruism1 Ambition7 Amends15 Anger25 Anniversaries2 Anonymity9 Anxiety14 Any lengths4 Apologies2 Apology3 Area / District / Region3 Argument2 Armed services liaison1 Arrogance8 Assets1 Atheism9 Attack4 Attention-seeking2 Attitude2 Attitudes1 Authenticity3 Authority1 Autonomy1 Avocation1 Balance2 Ballots1 Basic suggestions4 Bedevilments3 Behaviour7 Being wrong5 Belief4 Beliefs6 Big Book34 Bill Wilson2 Bill's Story1 Bitterness1 Blackouts1 Blame17 Blessings1 Boredom1 Boundaries47 Brainstorm2 BS-busting3 Business meetings16 Cabbages1 Candour3 Caretaking1 Causes and Conditions3 Certain Type of Hard Drinker4 Certainty1 Chairing7 Change53 Character2 Character assets2 Character defects42 Charity1 Chemistry1 Child of God1 Childhood1 Childishness1 Children1 Choice11 Codependency10 Cognitive biases1 Cognitive distortions6 Comfort1 Commitment9 Committees1 Common sense1 Communication6 Community2 Comparison1 Compassion2 Complacency2 Complaining7 Completion2 Compliance6 Compulsion2 Concept I12 Concept II10 Concept III19 Concept IV9 Concept IX11 Concept V14 Concept VI11 Concept VII7 Concept VIII6 Concept X13 Concept XI12 Concept XII23 Condemnation2 Conference4 Conference Charter1 Conference Delegates1 Conference-Approved Literature1 Confession3 Confidence1 Conflict11 Confusion2 Connection4 Consciousness4 Consequences2 Consideration3 Consistency1 Consultation5 Control24 Controversy1 Conventions and conferences3 Cooperation1 Corrective measures23 Courage5 Courtesy2 Craziness2 Credit1 Creditors1 Crises8 Criticism11 Current affairs1 Current Agnosticism1 Daily plan4 Daily programme21 Darkness3 Death Threats12 Debate3 Decisions41 Defence3 Delusion20 Demands43 Denial2 Depression14 Design for living1 Despair11 Detachment65 Detox2 Difficulties4 Diligence6 Directions6 Disagreement1 Discernment1 Discipline3 Discontent2 Discretion3 Discussion4 Disease3 Dishonesty3 Disruption1 Disturbance6 Doctor's Opinion2 Doubtful1 Dr Bob1 Dr Bob and the Good Oldtimers1 Drama8 Dreams1 Drinking6 Drugs2 Duties2 Early AA1 Early days2 Efficiency1 Effort6 Ego3 Electronic media2 Emergency measures9 Emmet Fox3 Emotional sobriety5 Emotions89 Empathy1 Empowerment1 Enabling2 Encouragement1 Enjoyment2 Enthusiasm5 Error4 Etiquette1 Evening review3 Events2 Evil2 Example1 Excitement1 Expectations7 Experience3 Explanation3 Extrapolation1 Extremism1 Facts1 Faith14 False idols7 Family2 Family Afterward6 Fatality3 Fear76 Fear inventory3 Fearlessness1 Fellowship18 First Things First9 Fit Spiritual Condition7 Flattery1 Flyers3 Food Addiction8 Foolishness1 Forewords8 Forgiveness34 Four Ms1 Fourth dimension6 Freedom10 Frustration1 Full measures1 Fun3 Fundamentalism2 Futility3 Future8 GA1 Gambling Addiction5 Games1 Gaslighting2 Generalisation3 Ghosting1 Gift1 Giving6 God132 God-consciousness5 God-reliance195 God's business12 God's will62 Gossip2 Grace9 Gratitude18 Grief5 Grievance6 Grouch1 Group conscience22 Group inventory1 Groups21 Growth3 GSR5 Guilt26 Half measures3 Hammer Man1 Happiness25 Harassment3 Hard times3 Harm6 Harry M. Tiebout1 Hatred1 Hebrew6 Hedonism1 Hell1 Helping11 Higher Power29 Hobbies1 Home group20 Honesty26 Hope10 Humility46 Hurt6 Ideals6 Identification4 Identity22 Illusions2 Immaturity3 Immorality3 Imperfection2 Impulse2 Inaction1 Inadequacy1 Incurability3 Independence2 Individualism1 Individuality1 Indwelling God1 Informal fallacies1 Ingratiation1 Innocence1 Insanity7 Insecurity4 Inside job3 Inspiration6 Instructions3 Intelligence6 Intelligent agent3 Intentions2 Interference5 Intergroup7 Interpretation2 Intimacy10 Intoxication1 Intrusion1 Intuition5 Inventory9 Irony1 Irritable2 Isolation1 JA1 Jaywalker1 Jealousy3 Jim's Story1 Joy10 Judgement16 Keep It Simple13 Kindness5 Knowledge2 Language14 Language of the Big Book7 Last word1 Laurels1 Leadership3 Learning3 Leaving recovery1 Lessons1 Let Go And Let God6 Let It Begin With Me21 Letting go20 Letting go of old ideas20 Lifelong conceptions1 Light4 Listening3 Live And Let Live1 Living in the triangle1 Logic3 Logical fallacies1 London1 Loneliness2 Long-term sobriety8 Loss2 Love31 Love Addiction8 Management3 Manipulation13 Materialism23 Maximum service10 Meaning1 Medical problems2 Meditation35 Meeting formats2 Meetings60 Mental Obsession49 Metaphysics1 Method3 Miracles2 Misery5 Mistakes1 Moderate drinkers1 Modesty1 Money3 Mood1 Moral aspect4 Moralism1 Morality10 More About Alcoholism2 Mortality2 Mothering1 Motivation / motives9 Multiple fellowships8 Musts1 My business2 Myths1 Narcissism1 Narratives2 Needs1 Negativity14 Neutrality2 Newcomers15 News1 Nicotine1 Nihilism1 Now7 OA1 Obedience1 Obsession3 ODAT117 Offence9 One Day At A Time12 Online forums1 Open-mindedness6 Openness1 Opinions2 Outlining1 Pain24 Paranoia3 Past14 Patience11 Pausing5 Peace19 People-pleasing14 Perception12 Perfection3 Perfectionism4 Persistence3 Personalisation2 Perspective8 Pharisees1 Physical Craving25 Physical health2 Pills1 Pity3 Plain Language Big Book2 Planning12 Playing God7 Politics1 Positivity4 Potential Alcoholic1 Power16 Powerlessness54 Prayer53 Preamble1 Preface4 Preferences2 Prejudice1 Preparedness1 Present7 Pride16 Primary Purpose7 Priorities4 Problem-Solving14 Problems69 Problems Other Than Alcohol6 Programme1 Progress7 Progression4 Projection6 Promises6 Psychic change2 Psychological aspect3 Public information7 Purpose16 Quarantining3 Questions7 Quotations1 Rationalisation1 Rationality2 Reactivity7 Reading3 Ready2 Real Alcoholic4 Realism1 Reality34 Realm of the material4 Realm of the spirit7 Reason13 Receiving1 Recordings1 Recovered vs recovering1 Recovery20 Redemption1 Relapse70 Relationships68 Relief4 Religion8 Remorse3 Requests2 Resentment86 Reservations1 Resistance28 Resolutions4 Respect1 Respond Not Reacting2 Responsibility71 Restless2 Restraint2 Results3 Reworking the Twelve Steps19 Right of Appeal1 Right of Decision1 Right of Petition1 Rigour1 Rising above the problem3 Risk1 Rock-bottom8 Romance1 Romance Addiction16 Rudeness1 Rule 621 Rules3 S-Anon4 SA5 Sabotage3 Sacred cows1 Safeguarding2 Safety2 Salvation2 Sane and Sound Ideal2 Sanity8 Sarcasm1 Satire1 Satisfaction1 Scepticism1 Second surrender19 Secrets2 Self (ego)120 Self-abandonment38 Self-absorption7 Self-care3 Self-centeredness1 Self-centredness7 Self-confidence2 Self-deception1 Self-esteem27 Self-forgetting10 Self-imposed crisis1 Self-justification7 Self-obsession13 Self-pity7 Self-reliance36 Self-righteousness4 Self-sacrifice4 Self-sufficiency1 Self-will31 Selfish programme3 Selfishness20 Sensitivity2 Separation from God5 Serenity2 Serenity Prayer8 Service66 Service meetings2 SETA 2024 Traditions in Relationships Q&A12 Setting aside1 Sex8 Sex Addiction20 Shame11 Sharing63 Shortcuts1 Silence3 Simplicity19 Sincerity1 Singleness of purpose1 Slavery1 Sleep1 Slogans7 Slovak1 Sobering up2 Sobriety16 Society2 Solution3 Solutions74 Sordid places1 Speakers1 Speaking4 Special interest groups2 Speculation2 Speed2 Spiritual awakening42 Spiritual basis5 Spiritual bypass5 Spiritual malady15 Spiritual pride3 Spiritual principles17 Spiritual solution14 Spirituality29 Sponsorship155 Staying close to God6 Staying sober2 Step buddies1 Step Eight26 Step Eleven78 Step Eleven (during the day)1 Step Eleven Review22 Step Five14 Step Four43 Step Four: Page 67 questions7 Step Four: Resentment Inventory16 Step Four: Resentment Inventory: Bridge Passage7 Step Four: Resentment Inventory: First Column4 Step Four: Resentment Inventory: Second Column7 Step Four: Resentment Inventory: Third Column15 Step Nine34 Step One123 Step One (Al-Anon)16 Step One (insanity)32 Step Seven54 Step Six44 Step Ten49 Step Three64 Step Three Idea13 Step Three Requirement14 Step Twelve10 Step Twelve (all our affairs)42 Step Twelve (carrying the message)74 Step Twelve (service)4 Step Two48 Step Two Proposition3 Step XII1 Step Zero5 Stopping drinking4 Stories3 Stress2 Structure of the fellowship1 Study2 Sub-committee3 Success11 Suffering17 Suggestions11 Suicide1 Surrender120 Sympathy2 Tact2 Take It Easy2 Talking9 Teamaking1 Therapy2 There Is A Solution5 Thinking126 Thirteenth Step1 Thoroughly5 Three Legacies1 Three-fold1 Time2 Tips4 To Wives3 Tolerance19 Toxicity2 Tradition I25 Tradition II23 Tradition III10 Tradition IV21 Tradition IX19 Tradition V22 Tradition VI12 Tradition VII15 Tradition VIII6 Tradition X20 Tradition XI14 Tradition XII16 Treasury1 Triggers3 Troubles11 True from the false (cannot differentiate)1 Trust30 Truth19 Trying1 Turning over9 Twelve Concepts13 Twelve Step Fellowships4 Twelve Steps41 Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions6 Twelve Traditions12 Two-fold2 Two-Stepping1 Uncommon sense1 Unhappiness36 Unity7 Unmanageability33 Untreated alcoholism2 Upset32 Urgency2 Usefulness8 Validation2 Values12 Vanity1 Victimhood52 Voting1 Vulnerability2 Wanting9 Wanting to stop2 Warranty IV3 Warranty V1 Warranty VI1 We Agnostics6 Willingness61 Willpower2 Withdrawal4 Work14 Workaholism2 Working the Steps14 Workshop packs4 World (the)6 Worry16 Worship1 Young people and AA1 Zeal3 עברית7 ענווה1

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First 164

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