“I cannot hurt others without hurting myself.” (ODAT, 20 January)
Reverse-engineering this, when I am hurt, I did it to myself.
It is my thoughts in response to what you do that hurt me, not what you do.
In one sense, I am only ever hurt by my own attack thoughts.
‘Put down the knife, Miss Sharp!’
Hoisted by my own petard: being thrown up into the air (‘hoisted’) by the explosive charge I set for others (‘petard’).