“If thou canst not make thyself such a one as thou wouldst, how canst thou expect to have another according to thy liking?” (ODAT, 27 September)
I cannot lift myself up by my own bootstraps.
I cannot change myself, from a standing start.
The first nine steps place me in a position where I am able to change.
The last three steps bring about change indirectly through action directed and powered by God.
Other people—forget it.
They won’t change.
Boundaries, requests, explaining how ‘what they do’ ‘makes me feel’: none of this makes the blindest bit of difference.
Work with the material given.
That’s the only way I’ve found that works.