“I learn I must use this power, not to change the alcoholic over whom I am powerless, but to overcome my own distorted ideas and attitudes.” (ODAT, 8 September)
If I do not need to change the alcoholic (noting that I cannot change the alcoholic), I do not need to think about what is wrong with the alcoholic. That cuts out a whole swathe of mental activity. I also do not need to discuss the alcoholic recreationally. True with everything else as well.
The only thing that is my responsibility is to work out what to do in response to each specific situation that arises. General policies generally will not do: each moment is different; each situation is different; there might be patterns, but one cannot evade the work of assessing each situation afresh.
But first of all, my thinking (ideas and attitudes) needs to be straightened out.
Which thinking? Almost anything I spontaneously think about I am necessarily thinking about in a distorted fashion. Anything I don’t think about spontaneously I am probably well-adjusted in relation to. So that’s my starting point: What does my mind hook on? What do I find myself thinking about for no good purpose? What do I find myself thinking about for more than a moment or with any intensity?
Once this is straightened out, the right action appears obvious. The way is clear, the light is good, I have no fear, nor no one should, the woods are just trees, the trees are just wood.