“To be doomed to an alcoholic death or to live on a spiritual basis are not always easy alternatives to face.” (Chapter Four, Big Book)
“When we became alcoholics, crushed by a self-imposed crisis we could not postpone or evade, we had to fearlessly face the proposition that either God is everything or else He is nothing. God either is, or He isn’t. What was our choice to be?” (Chapter Four, Big Book)
Imagine a room, a vestibule, with two exit doors. One is
marked ‘alcoholic death’. The other is
marked ‘spiritual basis’ (subtitle: ‘ego death’). No wonder it’s a difficult
choice. Both involve death.
But the vestibule is comfortable. Nice furniture, little
view of a garden, big samovar of tea, freshly de-packeted Oreos, nice and
crunchy. Why not just hang out here for a while? Or forever?
One day, the floor will give way. Actually, it could give
way any minute, maybe in ten seconds from now. By the time it gives way, it
will be too late to bolt for the door marked ‘spiritual basis’.
That’s when I realise I have to make a choice between the
two unpalatable options. Dawdling is folly.