“Of alcoholics who came to A.A. and really tried” (Foreword to the Second Edition, Big Book)
I can’t tell how I’m doing by how I feel. I can’t tell how
I’m doing by whether or not I’m under mental onslaught from lower forces. How
well I’m doing is reflected in (a) whether or not I am successfully refusing to
believe in and engage in such thinking and (b) whether or not I’m taking right
actions. Eventually feeling will catch up, but not on my timeline. Conversely,
feeling good does not mean I’m doing well, and being free of assailing thoughts
also does not mean I’m doing well: I’m simply not being tested right now. The
devil rarely bothers people who are already in his camp. It’s his lost sheep
who he’s after and are subject to his recruitment tactics.
The question is this: Am I really trying? If I’m really trying, right now, with right thought and right action, I’m doing well, even if I don’t feel like it.