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A talk on total reliance on God ...

on May 09, 2025

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Self-absorption7 Self-care3 Self-centredness7 Self-confidence2 Self-deception1 Self-esteem25 Self-forgetting10 Self-imposed crisis1 Self-justification6 Self-obsession13 Self-pity6 Self-reliance34 Self-righteousness4 Self-sacrifice4 Self-sufficiency1 Self-will28 Selfish programme2 Selfishness20 Sensitivity2 Separation from God5 Serenity1 Serenity Prayer7 Service64 Service meetings2 SETA 2024 Traditions in Relationships Q&A12 Setting aside1 Sex8 Sex Addiction20 Shame11 Sharing62 Shortcuts1 Silence2 Simplicity17 Sincerity1 Singleness of purpose1 Slavery1 Sleep1 Slogans7 Slovak1 Sobering up2 Sobriety16 Society2 Solutions71 Sordid places1 Speakers1 Speaking4 Special interest groups2 Speculation2 Speed2 Spiritual awakening36 Spiritual basis5 Spiritual bypass5 Spiritual malady14 Spiritual pride3 Spiritual principles16 Spiritual solution12 Spirituality27 Sponsorship151 Staying close to God6 Staying sober2 Step buddies1 Step Eight25 Step Eleven75 Step Eleven Review22 Step Five14 Step Four41 Step Four: Page 67 questions7 Step Four: Resentment Inventory16 Step Four: Resentment Inventory: Bridge Passage7 Step Four: Resentment Inventory: First Column4 Step Four: Resentment Inventory: Second Column7 Step Four: Resentment Inventory: Third Column15 Step Nine31 Step One117 Step One (Al-Anon)14 Step One (insanity)26 Step Seven48 Step Six42 Step Ten44 Step Three62 Step Three Idea13 Step Three Requirement14 Step Twelve9 Step Twelve (all our affairs)41 Step Twelve (carrying the message)73 Step Twelve (service)4 Step Two45 Step Two Proposition3 Step XII1 Step Zero5 Stopping drinking4 Stories2 Stress2 Structure of the fellowship1 Study1 Sub-committee3 Success10 Suffering16 Suggestions9 Suicide1 Surrender111 Sympathy2 Tact1 Take It Easy2 Talking5 Teamaking1 Therapy2 There Is A Solution5 Thinking115 Thirteenth Step1 Thoroughly3 Three Legacies1 Three-fold1 Time2 Tips4 To Wives3 Tolerance18 Toxicity1 Tradition I25 Tradition II23 Tradition III10 Tradition IV21 Tradition IX18 Tradition V21 Tradition VI12 Tradition VII13 Tradition VIII6 Tradition X20 Tradition XI14 Tradition XII16 Treasury1 Triggers3 Troubles10 True from the false (cannot differentiate)1 Trust27 Truth17 Trying1 Turning over8 Twelve Concepts13 Twelve Step Fellowships4 Twelve Steps34 Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions6 Twelve Traditions12 Two-fold2 Two-Stepping1 Uncommon sense1 Unhappiness35 Unity7 Unmanageability32 Untreated alcoholism2 Upset28 Urgency1 Usefulness8 Validation2 Values10 Victimhood46 Voting1 Vulnerability1 Wanting9 Wanting to stop2 Warranty IV3 Warranty V1 Warranty VI1 We Agnostics6 Willingness53 Willpower2 Withdrawal3 Work11 Workaholism2 Working the Steps14 Workshop packs4 World (the)6 Worry15 Worship1 Young people and AA1 Zeal1 עברית7 ענווה1

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Step four, resentments, third column: so what?

In 1993, I wrote my first Fourth Step inventory. I was instructed to use the Big Book as the guide. I had a wonderful experience, and it changed my life. I remained confused, however, about the purpose of the third column of the resentment inventory. In this column, according to the Big Book, we are encouraged to write which area of 'self' is affected by a resentment. There are seven: pride, self-esteem, personal and sex relations, ambitions, security, and pocketbooks (= money). The Big Book then remains silent on the significance of the results—in other words what to 'do' with this information. The Fourth Step inventory is certainly effective, even without further work on this third column, as the suggestions on forgiveness on page 67 will be largely effective in removing most resentments, at least for the time being. I remained stuck, however, in double-digit sobriety, with resentments I could not get rid of and resentments that kept cropping up in diffe...

How to get out of hell

What is hell? Hell is one's own mind when it's under the control of the ego. Here's an actual picture of the inside of my brain before recovery: How can you tell it's under the control of the ego? Desire, excitement, tension, fear, anxiety, grievance, resentment, guilt, shame, etc. None of what follows is novel or new, and I've written about these matters many times before, but it does no harm to periodically update the list and ensure it is furnished with my latest experiences and tips. What is set out below is basically everything I have tried that has worked plus a few things that really do not help. Have a good daily programme Pages 84 to 88 of the Big Book cover comprehensively how to structure and manage the day, from the moment one gets up in the morning until one goes to sleep at night. I will not rehash those four pages here, save to say the content falls under the headings of Steps Ten and Eleven, which can be read about comprehensively here and here . P...

The evil and corroding thread

Fear. "This short word somehow touches about every aspect of our lives. It is an evil and corroding thread; the fabric of our existence was shot through with it. It set in motion trains of circumstances which brought us misfortune we felt we didn't deserve. But did not we, ourselves, set the ball rolling? Sometimes we think fear ought to be classed with stealing. It seems to cause more trouble." (P. 67:2, 'Alcoholics Anonymous') Someone said to me yesterday: "whatever you reside in will manifest. If you reside in God, God will manifest; if you reside in fear, fear will manifest." Fear fear itself. There is a Jewish proverb, "to worry is a sin; the only permissible worry is that one worries." "Are we now ready to let God remove from us all the things which we have admitted are objectionable?" (P. 76:1) To arrive at the conclusion that fear is objectionable (which is the prerequisite for asking for its removal with sufficient e...

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