"The first requirement is that we be convinced that any life run on self-will can hardly be a success." (Page 60)
The following pages set out why: the conflict, confusion, resentment, fear, disappointment, despair, and weariness.
Let's inventory whether these symptoms are present and therefore whether we are running our lives on self-will.
Over the course of seven days, note down your experiences, as follows, covering one topic a day.
Conflict: Every time you experience conflict between you and something or someone else or within yourself, however mild or strong. For each time, write in just a few words the nature of the conflict.
Confusion: Every time you experience confusion about what is going on, what to do, or how to resolve any difficulty or doubt in your life. For each time, write in just a few words the nature of the confusion.
Resentment: Every time you are upset in any way, whatever the 'size' of the upset, whether it is mild annoyance, rage, or something in between, about the present or the past. For each time, write in just a few words the nature of the resentment.
Fear: Every time you are frightened, fretting, fearful, worried, anxious, or trepidatious, whether the feeling is fleeting or overwhelming. For each time, write in just a few words the nature of the fear.
Disappointment: Every time something or someone doesn't live up to your expectations. For each time, write in just a few words the nature of the disappointment.
Despair: Every time you wonder what it's all for or encounter a circumstance you are sure will never improve. For each time, write in just a few words the nature of the despair.
Weariness: Every time you feel low, sullen, resistant, tired, fatigued, exhausted, or otherwise lacking in resources. For each time, write in just a few words the nature of the weariness.
After one week, whatever is written down shows the extent to which I am still living life based on self-will and the results I am getting.