I have not found there to be anything to be frightened of.
Sure, there is the full range of human emotions associated with dating, but feelings are not bad. Resistance to them creates suffering, and it is the suffering that is unnecessary. When I accept the emotions, they pass and are gone.
If something is a mistake, admit it promptly, and move on. Don't pick unripe fruit, don't flog dead horses, don't eat raw cookie dough: find cookies.
Here's what I did:
Rather than starting with the body I started with the mind.
Find people whose company I enjoy as friends, who are reliable and sensible, and who I respect ethically and morally. Then see what builds. If a physical element arises, sobeit. If not, that's fine too. The main thing: find people I am relaxed with, not excited or tense with. Relaxed.
Previously, my dating, relationships, etc., started with the body. Disaster. Tension. Infatuation. Longing. General awfulness.
I'm now married, happily so. Sex is the condiment not the food group; and not everything needs to be seasoned.