1. Drop all demands. They're either unreasonable or they're unrealistic. If they were reasonable and realistic, they wouldn't be demands, they would be facts.
2. Don't take anything they say or do personally. They're not saying it at you; they're saying it near you. They were like that before you entered the room and they'll be like that after you leave the room.
3. Stay out of their internal world: deal with the external facts.
4. Stop trying to fix, change, or control.
5. Don't rescue, take charge, make excuses, or cushion the fall. Leave him lay where Jesus flang him; step over the body and get on with your life.
6. Disentangle practically: separate cars; separate mealtimes; separate finances.