I have acquired the habit of writing a quarterly housekeeping inventory, and sharing it with four people, before discussing any headlines with my sponsor.
Here is the procedure:
- Schedule the quarterly inventory for once a quarter.
- Enter the dates into one's diary into the future, so one does not forget.
- Pick a method.
- On the date in question, write the inventory, in one sitting preferably. Don't belabour it.
- If necessary, condense the results so they can be read out in 5 to 15 minutes max.
- Share with four friends who also regularly write inventory.
- Narrow down to a list of the top problems and corrective measures.
- Be prepared to present the problems and corrective measures.
- Present these to a sponsor.
- Listen to the sponsor's feedback.
- Take notes.
Follow up:
(1) List of people to forgive (pages 65–67 of the Big Book).
(2) List of people to make amends to.
(3) List of sane and sound ideals to grow towards (page 69–70 of the Big Book).
Implement. A good way is to read the sane and sound ideals daily, to keep the consciousness fresh.
Methods:
Review the first three Steps. Take Step Three.
# Step 1
Where have I engaged in compulsive, addictive, or destructive behaviour? ('Powerless over the first ...')
Where has my activity been immoderate? ('Powerless after the first ...')
What were the negative consequences? ('... had become unmanageable.')
Where have I been vigilant, worried, or preoccupied about another person's drinking, using, sobriety, or recovery?
What have I done to monitor, control, or regulate another person's drinking, using, sobriety, or recovery?
What do I think my problems are?
# Step 2
Do I like how I have been feeling?
Do I like what I have been experiencing?
Do I hope I am wrong in my beliefs, thinking, and behavaiour?
Do I hope that there is a different way?
Do I believe that there is a different way?
Do I believe that that different way will change my beliefs, thinking, and behaviour?
Do I believe that that will change what I feel and experience?
# Step 3
Am I done being in charge?
Am I willing to turn in all things to God?
# Inventory process
(2) Big Book pages 64–71 (complete Step Four).
(3) Page 67 questions.
# Page 67 question method
Make a list of areas:
- Major relationships
- Other categories of people (e.g. waiters in restaurants, people in shops, people at meetings, students, colleagues)
- Other areas of my life, e.g.
- Money
- Retirement planning
- Looking after my home
- Education
- Work
- Diet
- Exercise
- Sleep
- Hobbies
- Service
- Religion
- Anything else not already covered.
Ask the following questions:
'Mistakes': How am I seeing this relationship or area wrong? How should I see this relationship or area instead? What did I do I shouldn't have done? What did I fail to do I should have done?
'Selfishness': Where did I (unreasonably) put me ahead of others?
'Dishonesty': What lies did I tell? What did I fail to disclose that I should have? How was I underhanded? How did I deceive myself?
'Self-seeking': What was I after?
'Fear': What was I scared of losing or not getting?
'Blame': Where did I cause trouble or make things worse?
'Faults': Pick the top three at play in this relationship:
Arrogance; avarice; contempt; cowardice; cruelty; disobedience; distrust; domination; envy; gluttony; impenitence; indifference; jealousy; lack of discipline; lust; malice; over-ambition; over-sensitiveness; presumption; pride; prudery; pugnacity; retaliation; sentimentality; shame (hurt pride); sloth; snobbery; timidity; vanity; violation of confidence; wastefulness.
'Wrongs': What did I do that harmed others?
Add:
'Corrective measures': What should I have done instead / What should I do in future?
Example (imagine a work relationship):
Mistakes: Saw work as a way to make quick money. Should have seen it as an opportunity for service. Worked sloppy. Should have worked hard.
Selfishness: Put my ease and comfort ahead of my boss's priorities.
Dishonesty: Lied about why I hadn't done the work. Blamed Susan.
Self-seeking: Easy life. Money. Praise.
Fear: Hard work. Being called out. Being sacked.
Blame: Didn't follow instructions. Cutting corners.
Faults: Sloth. Shame (hurt pride). Disobedience.
Wrongs: Delivered bad work, and my boss had to work late to fix it. Susan got blamed for my bad work.
Corrective measures: Make amends. Show up early. Listen carefully. Take notes. Tell the truth. Work super hard. Ask for help if needed.