Why is one surrender not enough for most people?
The usual pattern:
I surrender my alcoholism because it's getting in my way.
I surrender my alcoholism because it's getting in my way.
I get well so I can get my way.
I then have to have a second surrender, where I surrender my way.
In AA, we get our marbles back, but the problem is, we want to own them, control them, and do with them as we wish. This produces fear, because the world is not kind to marbles.
We have to be willing to let go of those marbles and learn to be disinterested (but not uninterested) custodians of them.
We do what we must, as God guides, but we don't care, because it's not about the marbles.
It's about the relationship with God.