'Doing the Steps in Al-Anon'

Doing the Steps in Al-Anon is problematical. The green and white book on the Steps contains descriptive essays but no instructions. How Al-Anon works: Ditto. Paths to Recovery attempts to remedy this but simply presents lists of questions for each Step, which stops short of describing clearly and succinctly how the Step is actually taken. It's problematic, also, because many of the questions are irrelevant to the Step, concern another Step, are unclear in terms of what they're trying to elicit, are rhetorical, or are repetitive, and each set of questions either fails to cover all of the required territory, or covers it in such detail that the point of the Step if missed. In other words, it's a bit of a disaster. Blueprint For Progress is extremely elaborate, long-winded, and unclear in its purpose.

My experience with the Steps over the last 29 years or so is that the Big Book contains a perfect set of procedures (including some questions) for the Steps, requiring some guidance and elaboration from a sponsor, but quite adaptable to any problem, by simply substituting the nature of the problem in Step One, and adjusting Step Twelve accordingly.

An Al-Anon can use the Al-Anon literature, meetings, slogans, and ideas to flesh out the detailing of character defects and corrective measures, whilst using the Big Book method. In my experience, not only does this work; this is the only thing which works swiftly, reproducibly, effectively, and in a way which enables communication with members of the many other fellowships who use the Big Book. I've seen other methods tried, but none that effectively defuse the ego

I tried all sorts of approaches before I really tried the Big Book, and I found myself, even after much work, still gloomy, fragile, labile, triggered, shrill, blamey, and burdened with the past.

In my view, there is no need for AAs to 'do the Steps in Al-Anon', in the sense of adopting a different programme. In Al-Anon, we literally say we work the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. There is no hidden secret method that will unlock a door that remains locked with AA's Twelve Steps.

However, whilst doing the Steps, attending Al-Anon meetings, reading the Al-Anon literature, listening to others and recordings, and talking through inventory with Al-Anons will ensure that the Al-Anonism is effectively treated. If an AA finds their Al-Anonism kicking off, they can simply do the Steps. Not the Steps in AA. Not the Steps in Al-Anon. Just the Steps. The Steps are a mirror. If you look in the mirror and are honest, you'll see yourself, including your Al-Anonism.

Remember, there is only one problem, and that problem is self.

There is only one answer, and that answer is God.