Step Four has twenty-one questions. That’s it. Even some of
those overlap.
This is how it breaks down when I do it out of the Big Book (page
63 to 71).
First of all, let's colour-code the parts:
Resentment inventory
Page 67 questions
Fear inventory
Sex inventory
Now let's look at the detail:
1. Who do I resent?
2. Why? (= What did they (fail to) say or do?)
3. Which areas of self did this affect (personal / sex relations [how others treat me], pocketbooks [money], security [needs], ambitions [wants], and pride / self-esteem [image])?
4. What were my mistakes?
5. Where have I been selfish,
6. … dishonest,
7. … self-seeking,
8. … and frightened?
9. Where was I to blame?
10. What are my faults (character defects)?
11. What are my wrongs (harms to others)?
12. What are my fears?
In intimate relationships:
13. Where have I been selfish,
14. … dishonest,
15. … inconsiderate?
16. Whom have I hurt?
17. Have I unjustifiably aroused jealousy,
18. … suspicion,
19. or bitterness?
20. Where have I been at fault?
21. What should I have done instead?
12. simply collates 8. in one place.
3. can be used to guide 7.:
Personal / sex relations: What script am I giving them?
Pocketbooks / security / ambitions: What outcomes am I after, which are under threat?
Pride / self-esteem: How do (I think) they see me? How do I want them to see me? How do I see myself? How do I want to see myself?
2. Why? (= What did they (fail to) say or do?)
3. Which areas of self did this affect (personal / sex relations [how others treat me], pocketbooks [money], security [needs], ambitions [wants], and pride / self-esteem [image])?
4. What were my mistakes?
5. Where have I been selfish,
6. … dishonest,
7. … self-seeking,
8. … and frightened?
9. Where was I to blame?
10. What are my faults (character defects)?
11. What are my wrongs (harms to others)?
12. What are my fears?
14. … dishonest,
15. … inconsiderate?
16. Whom have I hurt?
17. Have I unjustifiably aroused jealousy,
18. … suspicion,
19. or bitterness?
20. Where have I been at fault?
21. What should I have done instead?
Notes:
13.–20. duplicate 4.–11. If questions 4.–11. are answered fully, 13.–20. will not reveal new information. 21. does yield additional information, however.Pocketbooks / security / ambitions: What outcomes am I after, which are under threat?
Pride / self-esteem: How do (I think) they see me? How do I want them to see me? How do I see myself? How do I want to see myself?