The actual content of 'people-pleasing' is well documented here and elsewhere. But I recently heard someone sharing about the experience of people-pleasing and how they are recovering from it, in a way that brilliantly and simply revealed the true motivations.
They said, 'saying "no" did not feel as good as saying "yes"'.
* * * * *
When I am 'people-pleasing', I'm interested ultimately in pleasing me. Pleasing them is pleasing to me. I'm a me-pleaser. You're just the instrument.