The situation is temporary. Anything can be tolerated for 24 hours or 1 hour, as long as a person knows that it will not last for ever.
When I was new, I was dealing with a backlog of bad circumstances that arose out of my drinking and addiction.
I decided: if I can get through this without using, I never need go through this again.
Resentment, which is really resistance of reality, is understandable, but it does not help me:
- It does not change the situation.
- It makes me unhappy.
- It makes me more likely to relapse (which will only make my problems worse).
- It blocks the Higher Power; it blocks my love of others; it blocks their love of me.
- It wastes away my life.
- It puts things beyond my control in charge of how I feel.
I need a solution to resentment, so that I can be free and at peace.
Firstly, I decide to view others as sick (= selfish because they're frightened). In other words, they're like me: when I'm full of self, I get frightened, and when I'm frightened, I tend to behave badly. I can't be free unless I free them of the judgement, too.
Secondly, I withdraw my assessment of the situation. How things appear at the time is not how they will appear months or years later. So I get ahead of the game and drop the story I've told myself. It's the story that's killing me, not the situation.
Thirdly, I pray to the Higher Power to be free of the resentment and resolve, whenever I start to dwell on the situation I am resisting, to do this:
Ask the Higher Power:
- To see what I can give to the situation.
- To see how I can be patient, tolerant, kind, and loving to the people around me.
- To see what I can learn from the situation.
- To see the situation as an opportunity.
I do this not because I'm 'good' but because I feel better when I do it.
If I want to feel peace, the above is how I do it. It takes practice, but it's doable.