Here's a set of tools that help me in my relationships with others.
Look at things from others' point of view.
How does the world look to them?
What does that explain?
Then detach: they're not evil; they're not even sick; they're asleep.
Or maybe they're just fine.
They're merely getting on with their lives.
They simply see and do things differently.
Don't meddle.
Don't take the bait.
('What?!' You know exactly what I mean.)
Keep it simple: eliminate everything that is not mission-critical.
Don't indulge my own acting out.
('What?!' You know exactly what I mean.)
Don't take a swim in the misery swamp.
('What?!' You know exactly what I mean.)
Basically, cut the CRAP (Criticism, Regulation, Argument, Punishment).
All the above will free up the resources for:
- Fulfilling a few obligations well: don't half-ass lots of things; whole-ass a few things.
- Setting aside time for genuine service.
- Setting aside time for myself and mySelf.