It's OK to have a plan for what to do and achieve, although the plan should come from God not my ego.
It's OK to carry through that plan, and that does sometimes require requesting things of others, negotiating with them, setting boundaries, and even, on occasion, force.
Anger is the realisation that something does not conform to the plan. Resentment is holding onto that anger, which is dumb and distracting.
Either the non-conforming fact can be changed, in which case: change it. Or it can't, in which case: go round it.
In other words: downgrade the demands to preferences.