"I forgive, but I also learn a lesson. I won't hate you, but I'll never get close enough for you to hurt me again. I can't let my forgiveness become foolishness."
"I am not looking to escape my darkness. I am learning to love myself there."
"Don't treat people as bad as they are. Treat them as good as you are."
"Breathe. You survived before, and you'll do it again."
Not every spiritual meme with a relaxing image and a quirky font is maximally helpful. I understand the above four quotations (if they are indeed quotations) I found recently, and they do contain good points:
- Forgiveness does not mean that you don't set boundaries.
- Self-hatred because of unresolved problems is a bad idea; self-love is good idea.
- Respond to poor behaviour with good behaviour.
- Have faith that you will overcome adversity.
The ego is a tricky little parasite, however. It will use anything to survive and propagate its ideas. The ego ideas that the above quotations presuppose are these:
- I am a body and can be hurt.
- The material world is what is real.
- Evil is real.
- Harm is real.
- It must be escaped through evasion in the physical world.
- Other people are bad, but I am good.
- I am above and therefore separate from other people.
- Forgiveness is a means of separation.
- Darkness is real.
- Darkness is out there, or ...
- ... darkness is inside, but I'm stuck with it.
- Things never really get better: but we do get respite.
The inverse of all of these is true.
- I am spirit and cannot be hurt.
- The material world is a theatre where drama plays out; reality is a oneness that lies beyond time and space.
- Evil reflects error and has no substance.
- What is harmful in a dream has had no real effects.
- The material world cannot offer refuge, but transcending it can.
- We are all perfect, sinless emanations of the infinite ('Children of God') (although we can be in error).
- I am one with others.
- Forgiveness is seeing past separation and recognising my oneness with others.
- Darkness is an illusion.
- Darkness is inside but can be dispelled by light.
- When we wake up, the dream is over and even forgotten.