I can't figure God out. God is very big. I am very small. It is the same with AA, society, the country, the continent, the world, and the universe. Whenever I think I've got it all figured out and am presented with two buttons: a red one and a green one, I haven't got it all figured out. So I unravel myself back to the beginning and ask God for the next right thought or action. If in doubt roast some leftover vegetables in the fridge or fluff some pillows.
Sure, do some inventory, do some step work. But don't expect much to change right away. Or even necessarily long term. You'll just know all your own potholes and swerve more of them more of the time. A little will change. In the meantime: live well today, messily. And be amazed, especially when something does change. The cynical are never amazed.
Living things want to survive, even in impossible conditions. Be a living thing.
The body never lies. If you're tired, lie down. If, when you're lying down, you're too tired to get up, stay there. Eventually you will get up. Whatever it is will have to wait.
Whatever it is that society is telling you to do, through your ego, is probably a bad idea. You're not a machine. You're not a factory. No one is standing there with a clipboard. It's really fine. If all you do today is some laundry and go to a meeting, you've had a successful day. It's really fine. I'm repeating myself for a reason.
Beware of voices, internally and externally, that present the past self as dumb, mean, base, and insincere. These might be accurate descriptions of moments but not of the person. When I lack understanding and compassion for my past self I will struggle with current defects in myself and others.
Shame, guilt, fear, and anger are not good long-term motivators, and barking is the wrong tone to take with me.
Some days, twelve steps, twelve traditions, and twelve concepts are too much. On those days, try: show up, pay attention, tell the truth, let go of the results.
If I create the conditions, God heals. Footnote: the conditions do not involve constant pressure either by me or by anyone else.
I can spend ten minutes looking in a Japanese grocery store for shichimi togarashi. Sometimes it's labelled 'assorted chili pepper', with shichimi togarachi in small print on the back. It is often the case that the solution is staring you in the face but you have to read the small print to even realise it's the solution. Check every jar and read the small print, because the solution has to be there. It's a Japanese grocery. They really do have everything.
If you try too hard to find God, you'll increase the separation. Instead, realise God's been there all along.
If you have forty-three things to do but time for three, then doing three and precisely three is God's will. The others are not God's will. Most of us need this spelling out really clearly.
You don't get to work out how it's going to be OK before you trust it's going to be OK. Once you've been trusting for a while, maybe it will be revealed, and maybe not. But you'll know it is OK.