Saturday, 2 December 2017

'I don't have any conscious contact with God'

'I don't have any conscious contact with God'

This is something I regularly hear, and I identify. I identify, at least, with the feeling of having no conscious contact with God. However, that does not mean I do not have conscious contact.

In Step Eleven, I seek knowledge of God's will and the power to carry that out. If I look back at the day and discover it filled with good, productive, and others-centred activites, I have indeed successfully discerned God's will and accessed the power to carry that out. If that be true, I do have conscious contact with God.

Whether I 'feel' that God is in the room with me is as much a matter of sentiment and speculation as anything. One regularly encounters people demonstrably living what one would aspire to as a God-based life, in the form of others-centred action, with cheer, flexibility, and equanimity. What matters is not whether I feel saved or enlightened but whether or not I am discharging my service obligations within and outside AA, and indeed going beyond the call of duty in both domains.

Today, I measure conscious contact with God by examining whether I am actively seeking God's will in terms of my attitudes, thinking, and actions today and whether I am successfully implementing what I discern. If so, I am in conscious contact, regardless of the more abstract sense of God's presence or absence.

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