The correct relationship is this: God is in charge; we are but agents; our lives are no longer our lives; our bodies are no longer our bodies; our fates are no longer our fates. God may indeed delegate us tasks that we are to perform for our own benefit, but only in as far as we are acting as God's agents. We are never to act on our own account. We go to God in humility in this connection on the basis that prior attempts at living have failed, to some extent or other. To the end of achieving or adopting once more this position, whatever resources are helpful must be used, whether direct self-examination, prayer, and mediation, or combinations of reading, listening, and talking.
Having arrived at this position, the remainder of the Step Eleven time must be spent determining what God's will for us is today, which boils down to the list of things God would have us do, and the spirit in which we should do them.