We had to let go absolutely

If you're swimming in a swimming pool, it's no good holding onto the side; you won't then gain the full experience of swimming, or indeed an experience that even remotely resembles swimming. Splashing about is not the sleek darting of porpoises.

Pray for weariness, the weariness of holding on. Whatever the dubious benefits of attachment, it's ultimately tiresome and tiring.

Join the French Foreign Legion. Abandon yourself utterly. Drop your identity. It is not yours anyway. You got it from somewhere and mistook it for you. It was an (undivine) thrusting-on. Run away and join the circus. Let go of the kite. Let it fly. You're the kite and you think you're the hand and the kite belongs to you and you're scared of losing it. So lose it and discover you're not what you thought you were, and, most importantly: the wind is not your foe.