What's the solution?
Analyse what I think is wrong with me? Run a bubble bath? Be kind to myself? Give myself a break? Take myself on a date? Phone a friend and talk about me? Journal about me and my thoughts and feelings? Think about it one more time?
If these do not work, you could try this. Or, actually, cut straight to this. Might save time:
The three basic questions I need to ask are these:
(1) How much time am I spending on Step Eleven in the morning?
(2) Do I have a plan for the day?
(3) What can I do for other people?
I do not get well by getting myself well. I get well by preparing myself to serve God by being his instrument in the world. "He has no hands but yours," as the old quotation goes.
"Instead of regarding ourselves as intelligent agents, spearheads of God’s ever advancing Creation, we agnostics and atheists chose to believe that our human intelligence was the last word, the alpha and the omega, the beginning and end of all. Rather vain of us, wasn’t it?" (We Agnostics)
Agnosticism is not (just) about not believing in God. It is about deficient or doubtful belief. It is about failing to see my place in the universe as an expression of God's love for others, there to serve Him by serving others, and running around using my mind to devise ways of making ME happy by getting what I think I want or need. This is what self-reliance is. This is what fails.
This line from Bill's story is the key:
"Never was I to pray for myself, except as my requests bore on my usefulness to others. Then only might I expect to receive. But that would be in great measure."
So, if I'm not receiving enough from God, I'm likely not giving enough to my fellows
"Dr. W.W. Bauer, broadcasting under the auspices of The American Medical Association in 1949, over the NBC network, said, in part: 'Alcoholics Anonymous are no crusaders; not a temperance society. They know that they must never drink. They help others with similar problems . . . In this atmosphere the alcoholic often overcomes his excessive concentration on himself. Learning to depend upon a higher power and absorb himself in his work with other alcoholics, he remains sober day by day. The days add up into weeks; the weeks into months and years.'" (The Medical View on AA)
In brief: I need to focus on others, not me.
When I am in the middle of my others-focused day, I will, of course, lapse into self-absorbed mind-chatter.
Step Ten can be used whenever I can catch myself trapped in my own thoughts:
"Continue to watch for selfishness, dishonesty, resentment, and fear. When these crop up, we ask God at once to remove them. We discuss them with someone immediately and make amends quickly if we have harmed anyone. Then we resolutely turn our thoughts to someone we can help. Love and tolerance of others is our code." (Into Action)