Friday, 3 June 2011

The Step Three idea

The Step Three idea appears to me to be this. God is the Director and, in fact, fulfils all of the roles other than actor, which is my role. Motto: "He has no hands but yours."

My role is vital: I cannot play anyone else's ... I can play only mine, and no one can play mine for me.

I am no longer in charge of the overall plan (director) or detailed execution (producer). I am no longer in charge of other people's moves (choreographer and stage manager). I am not there to prompt anyone if they forget their lines. I am no longer in charge of writing the script. I ASK the Director for my lines, instead. I am not the audience, either, nor the critic, nor the theatre-owner worried about the overall profit or loss the play is making.

My role is to remain in communication with the Director. The Director's voice is quiet, however, so I need to be quiet, too. Worldly clamours need to be silenced or at least hushed.

Worldly clamours consist in resentment (disturbance at the way I think things are or have been), fear (disturbance at the way I think things will be), or shame/guilt (disturbance at what I think I have been or done).

The next six Steps are needed, promptly and in their entirety, to silence these worldly clamours. Steps Ten and Eleven are needed to stop the clamours returning and to prepare me for the work of the actor, which is Step Twelve.

My job, therefore, is to stay close to God as my source of direction and power and to perform His work well, which means fulfilling Tradition Five (spending much of my free time engaged in Twelfth Step work) and applying the Steps to be of service in all areas of my life.

The promise on page 63 is that I get given all the resources from God as a loving parent provided that I fulfil these conditions.

My other "job" as one of God's kids is to love, learn, grow, and play.

And, as a kid of God, I do not need to be worried about the seven areas of self. These are now God's business, not mine:

(1) Pride (what I think you think about me)

(2) Self-esteem (what I think of myself)

(3) Personal relations (the script I give you)

(4) Sex relations (the script I give you inside the sexual arena—a subset of 'personal relations')

(5) Ambitions (what I want in order to be happy and satisfied (p. 61:1))

(6) Security (what I need to be OK)

(7) Pocketbooks (money and what it means to me).

To adopt the role of actor to God's Director, therefore, I need to take the remaining Steps promptly.

I do not need to work out how to get God in my life. All I need to do is to make the decision that that is what I want and take the remainder of the Steps.

I think carefully before this decision, because a Step Three will tend to set in motion a process in which that which is hidden within me starts to surface, and I need to make sure I am processing what is arising as it arises.

Step Three without a follow-through will give me awareness but no power. That is hell.

When I'm ready, I adopt the position described above then say the page 63 prayer to seal the deal. Then, immediately, I start writing the list of names for the Step Four resentment inventory.

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