Do I have to have a sacred space, a comfortable location, somewhere separate, somewhere pleasant, somewhere reserved to do my daily prayer and meditation?
No. God is available everywhere. On the cancer ward. In the trenches. And on the bus. Also, we are not after an aesthetic or sentimental experience but conscious contact.
Do I have to adopt a particular posture?
No. Just as when you are talking to Sally, she can hear you and you can hear her even if you’re standing on your head or reaching for a spanner. You know how to sit or stand. However you sit or stand, that will do. You don’t need to worry about your spine or your neck or how open or shut your eyes are.
Do I have to do special breathing? Do I have to breathe out fear and breathe in love?
No. Ordinary breathing is fine. The same breathing as when you’re doing maths, cooking the dinner, or talking to Clive. If you could breathe out fear and breathe in love, you wouldn’t need the steps. Fear and love are in your mind, not your lungs or the room you are in. You don’t solve illusions with illusions. You don’t need to be cute, reverential, or solemn. The relationship with God is a business relationship, not a religious relationship.
Do you need to pray at the same time or for the same amount of time each day?
No. If you find that convenient or effective, then so be it. But you’re doing it that way because it’s convenient or effective, not because there is a magic in the timing or duration. This is not a ritual. God’s presence cannot be scheduled, limited to a duration, or stretched to a duration.
Should you ask big questions, like why you can’t get rid of a character defect, or whether God can do something about your loneliness or unhappiness, or what the point of life is, or why you can’t feel God in your life?
Probably not. As soon as you define the question in this way, you’re painting God into a corner. Even in sponsorship, most questions to a sponsor are badly framed. The job of the sponsor is often to challenge the premises behind the question. In Step Eleven we find out what God wants us to do today and how He wants us to do it. If answers to big questions come, great, but that’s usually in only a fragmentary way and long after the event. Meanwhile God’s waiting to give you His orders for the day. Best stick to those. If you have a pressing trouble, maybe pop that in the mix, but guidance from God on reframing or rewiring tends to be drip-fed over the days and weeks following the initial enquiry. If you need to be rewired, don’t expect it to happen in the slot allotted.
When I listen for the voice of God, do I need to imagine God using terms of endearment in either direction?
No. This is firstly a different type of relationship than any relationship in which terms of endearment are used. Using that language creates that association, which can be unfortunate. God is not a cuddly toy, and we’re not His. Secondly, cosying-up is presumptuous: we all know what it’s like when someone acts like they are closer to us than they really are. Thirdly, it has nothing to do with the business at hand: knowledge of God’s will for us and the power to carry that out.
Should I write things down?
If you get a specific idea of a thing to do today or a notion about timing, prioritisation, and manner, and you are liable to forget, sure. But there is no need to write down verbatim the thoughts that come to mind. This isn’t a séance or automatic writing. We’re not Madame Arcati in Blithe Spirit. We’re not Helen Schucman ‘scribing’ ‘A Course In Miracles’. We’re certainly not doing ‘daily pages’ or journalling. We’re ordinary people. Plumbers and typists. Bakers and programmers. And if we really are artists, we might be more concerned with choosing the right acrylic paints or turning a good phrase in a screenplay than tapping the secrets of the universe. Even art is 99% technique and drudge. We are not channelling a spirit through a medium. We are not listening in to a wiretap. If you must write, think a little before you write, so what you write is coherent. There is no magic in the initial thought. There is no purity in the initial thought. The initial thought is often banal, nonsense, or mud. Worse, it is often spiritual claptrap: some rosy platitude or cryptic saying. It is not to be put on a pedestal. Use your intelligence to take what comes and produce sense from it.
What if nothing comes?
Let nothing come. That means you’re not supposed to know anything now. Don’t force it. You might contact a voice other than God’s. And certainly don’t start to do spontaneous writing, imagining what God might say. If God doesn’t deign to speak to you, don’t speak for Him. This is conceit and fancy. And dangerous to boot.
Do I need to check what comes against the four absolutes of the Oxford Group?
Only if you’re a fully paid-up member of the Oxford Group, which is unlikely. The absolutes did not make their way into AA literature as part of the programme, and for good reason. Instead, test what comes against the principles contains in the steps, traditions, and concepts. AA does not need to be improved.
Do I need to share the content with someone else?
If there is something you’re unsure about, sure, check it out. If you want to share it, by all means. But don’t proceed on the basis that God told you special messages meant for someone else, or vice versa. God isn’t tricky or sly. There isn’t a secret trail to the truth. We’re not in the middle of the ‘Da Vinci Code’.
Does this mean pages 86 to 88 are enough?
Yes. Boring but true.