“I go to Al-Anon for the instruction” (ODAT, 6 April)
I needed a bit of identification in early stages. That was to get me to stay, on the basis that there was a message here of relevance to me. I’m no longer interested in identification for its own sake. I’m interested in acquiring tools that work for situations in which I do not have sufficient tools.
It’s nice to feel understood, but it’s much nicer to find lasting solutions to unhappiness.
If I have a problem, I either know the solution and am not applying it, or I do not know what the solution is.
It’s important to find out which situation is operative.
I can then get down to business.