“And if a crisis arises, or any problem baffles me, I hold it up to the light of the Serenity Prayer and extract its sting before it can hurt me.” (ODAT, 5 March)
In any situation that disturbs me, there are usually numerous facts, factors, and circumstances.
Some I can change and some I cannot.
Those I cannot, I had better recognise the fact pronto. In particular, I must not fool myself that cajoling, attrition, manipulation, explaining, nagging, outwitting, outmanoeuvring, or one-upmanship will bring about constructive and lasting change.
Whenever I am struggling here, I have developed a dependence on something beyond my control. If something is beyond my control, I had better withdraw my dependence on it now.
With the things under my control—and control is the right word: many thoughts really ought to be under my control—my job is to go to God and ask for the right attitude and the right action, and then get on with. Some things can be changed in a moment; some, only with years of work. But change has to begin somewhere, and, as soon as change starts, I start to develop confidence that I am moving in the right direction. I might have moved only one inch away from trouble and towards haven, but the fact of movement itself is sufficient to convince me that the problem has been fundamentally solved.