In His will is our peace. (One Day at a Time in Al-Anon)
100% of the Al-Anon solution boils down to a relationship with God.
There is nothing else to discuss.
When I'm discussing something else, I'm trying to calculate without God and find peace some other way.
God's will: perfect (what God wants) or permissive (what God allows).
I must act in accordance with the first and cheerfully embrace the second.
That's it.